I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
as a side note pls kill me
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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