sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
