My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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