I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
