I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
my god I love twenty year old dicks
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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