Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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