bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My cat gives me a boner
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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