so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
