babies were throwing up all over the place
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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