the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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