why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
