It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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