This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
