Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
