The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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