It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
