exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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