Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
