My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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