Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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