Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
