we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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