I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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