I cannot find my penis.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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