just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
