Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
