im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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