went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
