And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
