i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
