why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
