this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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