How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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