you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
