Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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