Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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