we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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