He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
