Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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