we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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