Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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