So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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