You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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