5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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