Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
