They should really pass out barf bags in church
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
