Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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