If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
