I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
