he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
